The Devil Ate My Homework and Other Lame Christian Excuses

When I was five years old the family gathered to open Christmas presents after the Christmas Eve candlelight service. With a broad smile, my uncle presented a large, round, and light present to me. I quickly unwrapped the gift, as any five year old would, to reveal a beautiful replica of a Native American drum. My father peered at my uncle, who was obviously childless at the time, with a look that only a parent can give to someone who has just gifted their child with a drum. I apparently loved the drum because a few weeks later, my dad decided to teach me a very important lesson on how drums work. He asked me, “Do you know how drums work? When you hit the drum the boom-boom fairies inside get jostled around and they bump into each other making the boom-boom sound. Would you like to see the fairires?” “OF COURSE!” I said. Then he took his knife and cut the drum’s membrane, and when he did, the boom-boom fairies escaped. The drum never worked again. See, parents are not interested in what’s right and wrong. Parents are concerned with what’s quiet and what is not.

This Christmas my sister, Megan, gave Isabelle a lovely gift: a bright green Tinkerbelle megaphone. You’ve never heard “Jesus Loves Me,” unless you’ve heard it through a toddler’s megaphone. I did what any reasonable parent would do. I hid it deep within the Bermuda Triangle of our closet. Because my daughter is smarter than I, it wasn’t long before she found it. “Jesus love me, this I know!” But then she started singing other songs, “I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy, down in my heart; The more we get together, together, together; Part of that, world . . .” Instead of hiding the megaphone, cause she would find it anyway, I started recording what she was singing with my phone. Now when she learns a new song she wants to sing it, softly, into my phone so that she can hear it. I then email the songs to my family, and it’s a beautiful thing. I guess the megaphone wasn’t such a bad gift after all . . . What has God given you? How have you used it?

Last week we talked about heart, mind, soul, and strength people, and how they receive God’s word. Today I’d like to talk about what we do with what we have received. What is God calling you to become? God’s calling upon your life is your vocation. Your vocation is not necessarily your job. As my high school principal said during orientation, “Here is the place where you will learn the skills to pay the bills.” Your job is what you do to make a living. It’s what you fill out on your 1040. Your job is what you do, which is a little different than your occupation. Your occupation is what occupies most of your time. Your job may be to stack boxes in a warehouse, but your occupation is worrying about money. Maybe your job is maintaining websites, but your occupation is politics. Your job is what you do. Your occupation is what takes up most of your time. Your vocation is who you are called to be. Of course, the goal is for our job, occupation, and vocation to be one in the same, or what God is calling me to be is what I do, and it is evident in every area of my life. When I show up Monday morning to do what I do, am I doing it for the glory of God. Doctor, teacher, parent, lawyer, whatever, am I glorifying God today? If you have trouble answering this vocational question, am I doing God’s will, am I following God call upon my life, then you are in good company.

Jeremiah is standing before God and God says, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.” How would you react if God came to you saying, “I know you better than you know you. I have blessed you with a gift and this is how I want you to use it.” Would you say, “Here I am, Lord, send me!” Would you say to God, “Well, what exactly did you have in mind?” Maybe you would say, “Lord, you’ve got the wrong person.” The latter is Jeremiah’s reply to God. He says, “Lord, truly I do not know how to speak, for I am only a boy.” Scholars are unsure whether this means that Jeremiah was young or if Jeremiah felt inexperienced. For a moment, let’s assume Jeremiah is young. Those who work with children through Kids Hope USA know that some of the most profound things come from the mouths of babes, and this is precisely because they are young. Children like to ask, “why.” “Ok, I have to go to work,” Why? “So I can make money.” Why? “So that we can eat supper.” Why . . . and the conversation usually ends with “Because, I love you.” I am your father and I love you. Isn’t “why” the most common question we ask God? Why me? Why this? Why that? Why now? I imagine if we keep asking God, The Almighty would eventually reply, “Because, I am your father and I love you.”

When God speaks we are so quick to deliver excuses. Jeremiah has a good excuse. He’s young. He’s inexperienced. Are you sure? Really? (I hate these questions). But Jeremiah says, “Really?” Moses, I want you to free my people. Are you sure? I’m not good with words, per se. Gideon, go and deliver Israel from the hand of Midian. Are you sure? I don’t work out much. Solomon, You will be a great king. Are you sure?  I’m not the brightest bulb. The greatest prophets in history had excuses as to why God shouldn’t call them. I’m not strong enough. I’m not smart enough. I’m not worthy. Jeremiah says, “I am too young,” and God says, “Shhh. Do not be afraid. I’ll give you everything you need.” What’s your excuse? God has a way with excuses.

God’s plan for Jeremiah is “To pluck up and to pull down, to destroy and to overthrow, to build and the plant.” It’s a difficult job. I’d be lying if I said following God is always easy. I’d also by lying if I said it was never fulfilling and beautiful. Jeremiah records God’s words as a chiasm, meaning essentially that you start in one place and end in an opposite place. Pluck up to plant. Pull down to build up. It makes an X across the verse. Too often when God calls we place an X across what God has to say. When we do this, God puts himself of the X so that our excuses may be crucified. The Christ who was plucked up and placed on the cross was the same Christ who said, “youth doesn’t matter, let the children come to me.” The Christ who was pulled down and placed in a tomb, was the same Christ who saw a group of fishermen who said, “We’ve been fishing all night and haven’t caught anything,” before coming to shore with a new calling of fishing for people. The Christ who was destroyed and overthrown by the wisdom of the world, was the same Christ who gathered the disciples who said, “We do not have enough food to feed these people,” just before gathering 12 baskets of leftovers. Your excuses have been crucified. God has given you an extraordinary gift!  Go and take your bright green Tinkerbelle megaphone and go make beautiful music for the glory of God. Praise be to God. Amen.

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